101 Things done by Indian IT Professional (NRI) in USA

101 Things done by Indian IT Professional in USA
Do you ever know which top 101 things that any Indian IT professional would do when they are working/living in USA/Overseas ? Here is the list.

  1. Tell everyone that you will be going back to India in 2 or 3 years.

  2. Every-time thinks to open a consultancy company on looking at his employer how he is stealing dollars.

  3. Buy stuff in Walmart or Costco, use all the stuff and run back to the store, before the return policy expires.

  4. Try to speak in American Accent.

  5. Land on American soil because of a Desi Company and think of ways of ditching them as soon as he can€¦Hopefully when he gets the 2nd pay stub in hand.

  6. Checks Murthy.com 20 times a day and dreams that priority date will become current tomorrow!!!

  7. Always discuss about H1B, GC, Priority Date, EB3, EB2, EAD, I-140 whenever he get together with other Indians. Everyone in the discussion acts like a lawyer.

  8. The ones who are bachelors -> Be a frequent visitor bharatmatrimony.com/ rediff match maker and eventually go to India get married at jet speed and come back in 14 days.

  9. Make plans about starting a business after getting GC and making a million in one year.

  10. Live here, work here but always dream to be there (India)

  11. The Mind Set

  12. Multiply every Price Tag By 48 when he is new in USA

  13. Always dream that everything should go well. Nice job, fast green card, buy big house, new car etc. Dreams of Beemers, Ferrari but ends up buying Nissan/Toyota/Honda.

  14. I earn dollar and that’s great.

  15. Borrow money from good friends and forget them.

  16. Whenever he goes to Indian restaurant/Indian groceries in USA, he thinks in his mind “I should open a restaurant/shop”.

  17. Thinks that all Gujaratis are in business. Think that there is only two Indian communities out there in America/overseas, North Indian and South Indian. Anyone who cannot speak either Telugu or Tamil or Malayalam or Kannada is from North!!

  18. Always think that his America born and/or raised kids will be like him when they turns adult. Reality is always something else !

  19. Plans of going back to India to join a political party (thanks to AAP) and clean the system like Anil Kapoor in Nayak. Never does that actually..

  20. Facebook Mentality

  21. Checks in from Facebook in to Movies and important places. Uploads pictures/selfie on the Facebook and silently craves for the Like count to grow! Vigorously defends any negative comments on his Facebook post.

  22. Facebook becomes his place to become popular. After sharing some romantic photo or great selfie or pictures taken at the picturesque location, next thing this person would do is to check often how many friends liked the photo. Become proud of himself when the like count goes up..His goal is not to share the picture, the real goal is to make other jealous of his so called ability to do good in foreign countries.

  23. Follows all the Indian news channels NDTV, AajTak etc about the latest updates in India only to criticize either the Indian politics or the media for spreading speculative news and rumors on Facebook. Thinks he knows more about Indian political system then anyone else.

  24. Religious Mentality

  25. Consider himself very spiritual person, however goes to the temple only on Diwali, Ram Navmi , Janmashtmi when the free food is offered!

  26. Criticize all religous organization(s) and their heads or declares that certain religous organization is the best and the rest all others are useless.

  27. Donates money to Hindu temple in his area or some Indian cutlural event in his area just to show off or elevate his ego. Majority of these folks are businessmen who would donate enormous amount of money to the temple but wouldn’t give a single PAISA/Dollar to his needy employees.

  28. Racist Mindset !!

  29. Being born and brought up in India, he comes with a racist mindset although he always denies it. As a proof he would not make friends with an African American but would love if a white guy shows up in a family gathering.

  30. White friends are like trophies for him. Uploads each and every pic with a white friend on facebook and tags him along. Typical photo captions -” Steve Saunder’s surprise visit to our house”; “Barbeque with Sarah Clement and George Waterwood… Lovely couple”; ” My team at office -with Jason G, Paul Fitch and Sarah Jacobs”…

  31. Be mean to fellow Indians and try to charm Americans. Take loads pride in claiming a white skin to be their pal

  32. Listen to and willing to adapt suggestions/ideas of American boss in the meeting , gives a strong criticism to good ideas of their Indian co-workers/contractors.

  33. Desi Boss grinds the prospective applicant of Indian origin/name in IT interview, but goes easy on American applicant!

  34. Wish , Show and Tell

  35. Talking about white skin, the moment one lands in US ,his ultimate wish is to get lucky with one of these white women . However, this wish is only fulfilled for a few handful of desis sooner- others strike a compromise by visiting the nearest strip clubs.

  36. The working NRI couple or NRI businessman with one or two kids buys at least 5 or 6 bedroom home and then uses only 2 or 3 bedrooms the entire year!

  37. Talking about white skin, the moment one lands in US ,his ultimate wish is to get lucky with one of these white women . However, this wish is only fulfilled for a few handful of desis sooner- others strike a compromise by visiting the nearest strip clubs.

  38. Shares the most stylish photo taken at pictursque location , and feels proud when like count on Facebook goes up!

  39. Continue to tell the family and friends in India, that they miss them a lot where as he has not visited India in last 4-5 years ! Crib about how life in India was so much better! When he has no concrete plans of ever leaving the country.

  40. Proudly talks about the achievement of their toddler kids from being able to play on iPod, Wii to achievement at the school. Tells to everyone that includes family, friends, neighbors, co-workers.

  41. NRIs living in same neighborhood compete against each other whether it is a interior decoration of their home, size of their home, their kids progress at school. Do not let any opportunity to pass up to criticize other.

  42. Buy an iPhone, iPod, Bose Headsets , Laptop, uses Wi-Fi router at home and then do not let any opportunity to miss to tell what he has at home !

  43. Offers a ride or a tour to his recently purchased luxury car to everyone he knows in USA .

  44. Goes to massage parlor and tells the story of it to those who have not been there yet!

  45. Always swears or pretends to wife that he is the most honest husband she could ever have!

  46. Talks to relatives in India about how cold it gets in the winter with snow.

  47. Time to time, try to tell how Cricket is played to their fellow American co-workers.

  48. Gets in to show business of impressing others whether it is new home, car or a fancy gadget or educational progress of kids, lucrative job of spouse, it must be better than others including wife’s appearance!

  49. Use orkut.com, facebook.com to stay in touch with friends

  50. Spends a good amount of time in reading/forwarding this kind of articles, eenadu paper, cricinfo live during the working hours and get paid $60/hour or more at the job !.

  51. Pack on the Indian foods; do not waste it at all, as this will be an Amruta next day.

  52. Check for deals online every day in office. Always thinks what he can send to India.

  53. Explains their American co-worker about each dish at the Indian restaurant.

  54. Time to time dreams about screwing a beautiful girl working in his office.

  55. Spends countless hours in office to find the cheaper price tickets to visit India.

  56. Tells every DESI that his American boss is an idiot.

  57. Does not invest in 401K (Retirement Plan) because he thinks that he will leave this country anytime.

  58. On Bench

  59. Prepares a fake resume of having more than 6 years of professional IT experience, even though never worked on any professional project.

  60. Curses his luck, forgets all that he earned and do not miss any opportunity to criticize USA, Americans, economy etc.

  61. Calls/Emails other friends in USA , asking them to send their marektable resume so that he can copy something from their resume.

  62. All of a sudden starts to feel that he is less paid, his current H1B employer is stupid and starts planning to ditch his current H1B employer!

  63. Other things

  64. Invite parents on visitor visa and make them stay here for social security/tax benefits/baby sitting!

  65. Try to bypass one / some of the middle layers in the H1B contract.

  66. Blame Parents for not finding a girl or right match!

  67. F1 turned H1 look down at direct H1 imports.

  68. Travel/ Going Places

  69. Goes to a beach and find that he or his wife is the only one wearing more clothes than most others!

  70. See Niagara falls, go to Las Vegas and Disney (with family), visit Canada with its Visa and see Niagara Falls from Canada side !

  71. Go for helicopter city ride or balloon ride

  72. Visit Church/Temples/Mosque/Gurudwara and get a feel of being an Indian.

  73. Always looks for FREE wi-fi hotspot when he is traveling.

  74. Go for a 6 to 8 hour long drive to see a friend and gets back home probably same day!

  75. Skips the local sightseeing places but Niagara, Disney, Las Vegas, Washington D.C , Disney World, Disney Land are always his/her priority.

  76. Goes to beach with family and will utilize all the opportunities to drool those GORIs in front of wife and kids by wearing black glasses.

  77. Changing Life Style

  78. Start calling lifts as Elevators , Petrol as Gas, Curd as Yogurt,trains as trolleys , bringals as egg-plant. On spelling names to folks in India ….’z’ becomes ‘zee’

  79. Start looking for babysitting work for highly educated wife on H4/EAD or Green Card.

  80. Downloads and Watches Indian Movies on LAPTOP ,imagines that he is watching it to on a 70mm screen.

  81. Yes turns to ‘yup’ and no to ‘nope’

  82. Always search for FREE desi movies or FREE desi channels to watch.

  83. Happily lives life with minimum luggage/commodity to accommodate ever changing location of client/contract because of H1B visa.

  84. Becomes obedient husband of a wife. Anything you ask him to decide he would tell “I will ask my wife and let you know!”

  85. Miss Telugu friends ( surprisingly all over the place) , if all Telugu then , dividing people in different sub groups (Telangana, Rail Sima) further division by caste (Reddy , Choudhry)

  86. Wait in long queue for the whole night on a Day After Thanks Giving Day ( a Black Friday) for electronic gadgets !!

  87. Gym becomes an essential..Desi women ogle at whites and we know what Desi men go for…

  88. Stupidly feel high about their skills in dealing Americans through working in Gas Stations.

  89. Talk about more Calories, eat calories, burn calories, live calories.

  90. Hi /Kem Cho/Kya bey/Kaise Ho turns to ‘whassup’………chicha/mama/macha turns to ‘dude’

  91. Eat loads of rice and then drink diet coke.

  92. Lives life with compromising traditional culture upbringing in India for example eating meat, occasionally drinking alcohol, Jain eating eggs, garlic etc.

  93. Buys a home and instead of enjoying the stay, often complains about yard work and mortgage payment.

  94. Talks about returning to India after getting green card then talks about going back after getting US citizenship. And finally never returns to India.

  95. Claims to know many people and have many friends in the city , but does not know the name of next door neighbor.

  96. Do not smile enough, rarely uses dental floss and deodorant.

  97. Cringes when a time comes to tip waiter/waitress.

  98. Carries a perception that all gals in bar who drink, smoke and dance are “easy and character less!”.

  99. Rarely donates any money to charitable trust/cause. And only donates money either to get some fame or a tax break, mostly there is no underlying instinct to help community.

  100. Opens the Warehouse club membership accounts with friends not living together to save money on annual membership. There are others(Idiots) also who thinks that this membership is costly and you cannot save any money.

  101. Forget about his Techie pasts , now that he has made it …get laid back.

  102. Visit local Indian Temple nearby with a planning that you will only go there if they are serving Maha Prasad (also known as free lunch or a dinner!).

  103. Claims to be spiritual and God’s man, but goes to temple may be once or twice a year.

  104. Miss authentic Indian food at the Indian restaurants, and starts talking about how it would taste if he would be eating same food in India!

  105. Buy a new cell phone every year.

  106. Pay extra money on cable TV so that spouse can watch Desi Saas Bahu Soaps.

  107. Cricket is the only sports that he can play rest other sports are not so interesting or cannot play in USA.

  108. To be fit and with an ultimate goal of weight loss occasionally goes to Gym, jogs, plays tennis and then eats more resulting in weight gain !!

  109. Becomes really mean and selfish, ONLY those friends/relations that can be of any use are worthy rest all are useless.

  110. If he/she has a lastest model of iPhone provided by employer, then does not miss any opportunity to show off as if he/she got a Nobel Prize or Param Vir Chakra.

Yashvinder Singh and Milapkumar Patel contributed in this article.

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